For what ever reason I felt like I needed to write tonight. I mean I’ve had that feeling at several instances over the last couple of years since I last hit publish. Writing is hard, I’ve always known that, so I’ll just blame my lack thereof on a massive writer’s block. A lot has changed in my life from the last time you read my words on here. I hope to speak on that once I’m back in some sort of groove. I’m currently trying to develop some new habits while I scrap old ones. Everyone says the secret to improving is killing your old self. I always saw that as super aggressive. There are parts of me, hell there are parts of all of us that I think truly make us ourselves. Should those parts be developed? Yes, but I think totally killing your old self is a stretch. I also think the thing about change that no one talks about is how depressing it can be. Outgrowing old versions of yourself and burying self deprecating habits is a bit like mourning. If you’re anything like me you will relapse into yourself. It won’t just be once, but I think the key thing to remember is that you always have a shot to try again. There is no cookie cutter image of change. Growth is growth even when its 1 step forward and 3 steps back.

Here’s to new habits…a new year…a new president. I constantly crave newness. Trying to switch out my wants for new things with new possibilities. One possibility of which that is anything I want is attainable if I put the work in.

JC.