God damn, what a time, what a year. As we close out syllabus week of 2018, how has everyone embraced the new car feeling that comes with a new year? Well, I for one rolled into this year feeling a bit differently than usual. I’ve never been the one for much hoorah on NYE, only really stepping out one year, but kicking it with the fam is often good enough for me. Things weren’t much different this year. But I didn’t even blink at midnight. Of course, I heard the weirdos shooting fireworks, guns, cannons, and whatever else they could get their hands on, but I didn’t even utter the words “Happy New Year”. I still haven’t actually outside of text messages. “Happy Year You Deserve” sounds a lot more appropriate.

I once read that days are long and years are short and 2017 helped me to realize that. I’m not sure if it is because I am getting older or what but I come into 2018 with no expectations. Sure, I have my goals like everyone else, but ultimately I’m not judging myself off of where I stand 360 days from now. I’m going to accept my good days and my long days for what they are on the road to where I want to be.

2018 feels new. But not as new as usual if that makes sense. 2018 feels like that first shot you take at the bar after you explicitly stated that you would be taking no shots that night. So sure, I’ll take 2018, but who knows how the rest of the night is going to go. This plays into the feeling of indifference that I’ve felt opening this year. Well, I have been feeling indifferent for quite some time actually. This is the first time in a while that I can remember where I don’t feel close to anyone or anything. I have my family and friends that I love, but I don’t know much about anyone anymore, and no one knows much about me. I like it this way, but part of me wants to be more open to knowing people like that. However, I don’t see this happening anytime soon as I’m just beginning to see that a lot more people are just coming and going. I’m realizing that people disappear. They become shells of their former selves, then they distance themselves from you, and then have the nerve to blame you for moving on without them. It’s all just very temporary. A lot of the times, or shit all the time really I just stay home and to myself because people to me seem off these days. Sometimes I try to tell myself to relax and that I’m crazy for thinking that, but I’m seeing it every day. Wildly into my thoughts here but ever since fall began I feel like if I haven’t heard from you in a long time that I don’t know you.

So yeah here’s to the new year and such. I’m hoping we all have the year that we deserve. But if you take anything from this post I just want you to embrace your days this year. Good and bad because those will be what you remember moving forward. I don’t remember much about 2017, but I do remember the day I first got hibachi delivered to my apartment. Trussssss mi.

Yours Truly,

Joe.